I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
