No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I am naked and annoyed.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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