Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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