I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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