Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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