No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
