Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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