Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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