did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
