Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
