We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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