Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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