left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
