Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
