Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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