I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
