im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
In other news, I just burned my penis
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Randomize
