So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Randomize
