now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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