I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
