actually, I'm a sock model
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
