i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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