that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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