I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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