i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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