What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
