The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
