tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Someone signed my nipple.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
