if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Randomize
