I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
