apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
