Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
