Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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