Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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