so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
