big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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