i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
