this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
she peed on how many people?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
