Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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