forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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