there's paper in my vomit.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize