So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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