i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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