so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize