So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
