idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize