that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
She needs sedatives and a leash
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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