i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
