What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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