you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
