Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
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how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
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I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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