my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
